Monday, October 25, 2004

Paying attention to the signs in your life...

Not pregnant. Yet another reason to not like “that time of the month.” But God’s will be done, not mine. He sees all things, past, present, and future and He knows what is best for me and you.

The signs in my life are getting pretty loud that this is the time. Your daddy’s cousin Lisa came to visit us this weekend and brought her two kids. Little Katy is only a few months old. She is such a content little baby – never crying unless she’s hungry or really, really tired. I hope you will be that way. I think it would break my heart if you were upset a lot and I was never really sure why. Maybe that’s just the nervous mommy in me speaking. I want everything to be perfect for you. Sometimes your daddy acts really scared about the whole concept and other times he’s just so at ease. This weekend he played with little Katy as if he was a natural at the whole thing. Of course, one of the signs that this is ally going to be fine is how well he gets along with children and children with him. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a toddler or baby who wasn’t drawn to him, or that he couldn’t make smile or laugh. I understand that – he has that effect on me too.

I really enjoyed being with Samuel and Katy (Lisa’s kids). Sam is really rambunctious, but his imagination and his way of expressing himself are so amazing. Katy was so content no matter who was holding her, so I held her for awhile. What a feeling to cradle a God-given miracle in my arms…to feel her breathing, to see her little movements and facial expressions. I want to experience that for myself in you, my child-unborn.

Another sign I’m paying attention to is how much our parents are ready to be grandparents. I guess its most obvious with your daddy’s mom and dad. They both are so drawn to babies. If there’s one to be held, then she is usually holding it. My mom is little less obvious, but the way she makes so much over my cousin’s children, I know she will be an awesome grandma too. And my dad, well, I’ve never had any doubt he would make the perfect granddaddy. That leads me to another sign: as much as I’d like to ignore it, my parents and my parents-in-law are getting older. I want you to know the joy of having two sets of grandparents to love you, and teach you things, and spoil you! I only had my grandma and granddaddy, and now I just have grandma. I want her to know you too…and I want you to get to meet your daddy’s grandparents too.

So all the signs point to the same conclusion…its time.

Monday, October 18, 2004

Turn Back the Clock

In the fall; what hour of my life would you most like to relive as you turn the clock backward ?

It's almost time to turn back the clocks for daylight savings time. It makes me reflect on the idea of what hour of my life I would most like to relive if I could turn back time as easily as I turn back the clock.

There are several hours that come up in my memory as favorites. Times spent with friends and family...special moments of accomplishment...special moments in my walk with the Lord where I received particular blessings, or was able to help others to receive from the Lord...a moment of discovery when I came to realize I was important to someone...

But the most wonderful hour of my life was the hour I spent with your daddy the day he asked me to marry him. It was my birthday. I had come to his house to spend some time with him before we went out to eat with my family. He asked me to come into the living room and sit with him on the couch. I figured he was going to give me my birthday presents so I didn't think anything of it. He pulls out a letter I had written him a long time ago. In the letter, there was a sentence that said, "I hope someday I can be Mrs. ________. You can fill in the blank." He pulls out a pen and proceeds to fill in the blank. Before I could even realize what was happening, he was down on one knee, with a ring box in his hand, asking me to be Mrs. Bryan. I was so happy I cried. He did too! It really was a dream come true for me.

I pray right now that God will prepare the person that will become your future spouse -- that they will be the man or woman of God you need them to be, and that they would become that person of love, faith, and integrity that you deserve.

Friday, October 01, 2004

Frightening Old Ideas

John Cage once said, "I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones." There are a lot of old ideas that frighten me in their tenacity to cling to life.

Racism frightens me. That people can be stereotyped by the amount of melanin in their skin, irregardless of their background, upbringing, education, or personality is simply scary. Don't ever allow yourself to slip into that kind of ignorance of thought.

Inflexible traditionalism frightens me. God is constantly doing a new thing...He is able to meet the needs and culture of every generation. I recently heard someone who I considered a strong Christian parent say of a Christian rap song we were playing at a youth event, "I don't hear any God in that, and I don't believe God is pleased with it." It shocked me. As long as the Gospel is not diluted or altered, it should not matter the means by which it is transmitted. Style of music, style of service, or who is the vessel delivering it are all irrelevant to God. Always be open to the moving of God's Spirit, no matter how old or how new the method He employs.